Dr. Nicole Clay

Dr. Clay is a compassionate therapist specializing in both individual and couples therapy. Her areas of expertise and interest include betrayal, complex trauma, relationship problems and sex therapy, chronic health conditions and pain, ADHD/Autism, disordered eating, anxiety and obsessive-compulsive disorder, and neurodivergent relationships.

It can be difficult and exhausting to navigate the world when your emotions are in the driver’s seat. Many people are suffering in ways that no one else can see, trying to make it through the day carrying the weight of anxiety, intrusive thoughts, or secret pain in some area of their life. You may be dealing with the aftereffects of trauma or betrayal in an intimate relationship. Perhaps you are someone who has received messages from the world around you that you are too sensitive or your emotions are “too much,” leading you to criticize and invalidate your own experience. You may have learned to deal with your emotions in ways that cause further distress, such as engaging in self-destructive behaviors or showing up in your relationships in ways that do not align with your values. You may be trying to manage an ongoing medical condition with complicated or distressing symptoms that cause significant disruptions in your life. The idea of facing any of these things can feel overwhelming. 

Dr. Clay helps individuals who have been shattered by broken trust. Perhaps your sense of safety has left you questioning your own judgment. Betrayal trauma can be deeply painful and confusing. Dr. Clay offers a safe and supportive space for you to explore your experience, process your emotions, and begin to rebuild your trust in yourself and others. Together, she can help you work through the confusion and self-doubt, develop healthy coping mechanisms, and help you navigate the path towards growth.

Dr. Clay believes that healing begins with a validating environment. Her first priority when meeting you is providing a welcoming and nonjudgmental space. Dr. Clay has extensive training and experience in the evidence-based approaches of dialectical behavior therapy (DBT), acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT), and cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). She is especially drawn to DBT, which emphasizes a balance between acceptance and change. You are likely considering therapy because there are things you want to change. There are also probably some things in your life that cannot be changed just yet, or maybe ever. You may be getting stuck in avoidance, denial, self-criticism, or shame. Dr. Clay will support you in cultivating self-compassion and acceptance, making meaningful life changes, and celebrating your unique strengths.

Dr. Clay brings a combination of clinical expertise and lived experience to her work with neurodivergent individuals and couples. She is passionate about helping you find ways to work with your brain instead of against it. She knows that therapy is not one-size-fits-all and approaches sessions with curiosity and creativity. She often works with clients to navigate areas including recognizing and managing sensory needs, integrating practices that support nervous system regulation, exploring different aspects of identity, communication and self-advocacy, and attending to trauma and other mental health concerns that can arise from or interact with the challenges of existing in a neurotypical world. Dr. Clay understands the various aspects of neurodivergent relationships that may lead individuals to seek couples therapy, including differing needs or preferences in the areas of emotional and physical intimacy, sexual desire, communication, and resolving conflict. She is committed to helping couples find joint solutions that honor and address each partner’s unique needs.

Dr. Clay also enjoys supporting clients with sexual concerns and helping them achieve sexual wellness. She is passionate about helping her clients understand and work through low desire, sexual pain, and wounds from sexual trauma in order to experience a joyful and intimate sex life.

Dr. Clay received her doctoral degree in clinical psychology at the University of Oregon. She is originally from Pittsburgh, PA. Her special interests include spending quality time with her three corgis, videogames, and collecting more books than she will ever be able to read.